I am married to a good man, but often I find I am frustrated, lonely, or resentful. How do I know if these are normal parts of a good marriage, or if we need to start therapy to work on making our marriage better? I don’t want to ignore warning signs, but I also don’t want to make a mountain out of a molehill!
Signed, Checking in on my Marriage
Dear Checking In,
Yours is a common question. I think therapy can be helpful for a lot of couples, especially if you approach it as an opportunity to explore creating a shared vision for your relationship and then mapping out a plan for making that vision a reality. Too many people think therapy is for “crazy” people when in reality, it is a wonderful resource for anyone seeking to create change in their life.
A great way to begin to decide if you would like to pursue therapy would be to talk with your husband and see if he thinks it could be helpful. If you both still feel confused about starting therapy, a good option is a relationship check-up. This can be scheduling one session with a therapist to assess together what your concerns are and how therapy might help. It may also be reading a book together (like Scream-Free Marriage by Hal Runkel or Why Marriages Succeed or Fail by John Gottman) and discussing what aspects of your marriage you like and don’t like. It can also be participating in a marriage program at church, the local YMCA, or through your child’s school. A popular, well respected program is the Prepare-Enrich program, which gives couples an opportunity to complete an online questionnaire and then work with a trained facilitator (often a trained therapist, but not always) to discuss the results and highlight couple strengths and areas for growth.
One of my associates, Allison Hopper, is currently offering the Prepare-Enrich program. See the information below for more information.
I wish you the best of luck, and I am glad to see you are listening to what you want in your marriage and taking a thoughtful, balanced approach to addressing those needs.
Shelby Riley, LMFT of ASK SHELBY Presents
Strengthen Your Marriage
Sign up for the Prepare-Enrich Program Today!
Special Limited Time Offer for Chester County Moms Readers—
$10 off each session!
Your marriage is one of the most important and satisfying relationships you’ll ever have. A successful marriage takes an investment of time, effort, and a commitment to your partner and the relationship.
By taking the Prepare/Enrich Program online assessment and meeting with a trained facilitator, you will identify your current strengths and growth areas as a couple and learn important relationship skills to make your marriage more intimate and more satisfying. From beginning to end, the program is designed to be comfortable, relaxed, and fun.
The Prepare/Enrich Program assessment can be customized for dating, engaged or married couples.
If you’re in a committed relationship,
Prepare/Enrich will give you the tools you need
for long-term happiness and success.
$29.95 for access to online inventory of approximately 160 questions designed to assess your relationship strengths and growth areas.
$85.00 per session with a facilitator who provides feedback to help you understand your results as well as teach important relationship skills and address couple concerns. The results are presented over 4-8 sessions depending on results and couple needs. (Chester County Mom readers: Mention “Chesco Moms” before February 14, 2012 and receive $10 off each session with your facilitator).
Call Allison Hopper, DO, marriage and family therapist, at Shelby Riley, LMFT and Associates, LLC for more information and to get started today: